Our Taj Mahal Beats Their Hawaiian Junket!

So the 9th Circuit wants to play that game:

Two senior Senate Republicans on Monday blasted plans by judges in the 9th Circuit to hold a conference in Hawaii this August that they said could run up a tab of $1 million or more, and includes a schedule of sport fishing, yoga, surfing lessons and Zumba dancing lessons.

 Pikers!

A measly million, and some yoga and surfing -- that's nothing.

Call me when you've got miles of African Sapele wood, 60 inch flat screens and Italian granite -- then you can play in our "sandbox," as the lawyers down here like to say.

I actually think the room rates are quite modest for Hawaii in the summer -- deluxe ocean rooms at the Hyatt Regency Maui for $250 a night?

(Note to Adam Rabin -- I hope you haven't booked our next Bench and Bar meeting yet!)

 Now this is what I call real networking:

Happy Tisha B'Av -- Temples Destroyed, But We Got Ourselves a Denny's!

Oh South Florida legal community, why are you so hungry for malicious gossip "news"?

Does it matter, as Julie Kay writes today, that your websites will no longer comply with Bar rules?

(This, of course, assumes that they ever did.)

More importantly, now that the Palm Beach County Bar Association is moving into a former Denny's, should we feel bad for the bar or for Denny's -- all I know is Adam Rabin better make me an omelet if I show up there s@*tfaced at 3 in the morning.

And to the blog visitor who arrived here via a search for "Israel hot girls," I'll have you know that today is Tisha B'Av, only the saddest day on the Jewish calendar (that says a lot, believe me).

Sure we lost two temples, the most treasured of treasured holy sites desecrated twice by invading heathens -- plus a lot of other bad stuff happened on this date, like the expulsion of the Jews from Spain in 1492 and World War I, to name but a few lowlights.

But on the other hand, we have gained a Denny's.

Let me repeat it, slowly, in perfect....Rabbi.....diction -- we have gained a Denny's.

That reminds me -- did I mention everyone is supposed to be fasting today?

Adam, I 'll see you later tonight and I'm gonna be hungry (btw -- ham, mushrooms and cheese, thanks!).

FBA B SD FL BABC Awards!

Don't you hate lawyers who insist on lengthy, unwieldy acronyms to denote a party in a brief when it is abundantly obvious who is being referred to?

Last I checked, these acronyms (or initialisms?) are supposed to assist, ease or otherwise make the reading experience better for the reader, not clog up a brief with technically accurate yet preposterously long combinations of random initials that serve no purpose other than to make your sentences unreadable.

Alright, onto the FBA B SD FL BABC awards!

Best 70s building that was vaguely updated at some point in the late 80s:

Doral!

Yep, that hulking, aging colossus served us well and showed us that hairy old dogs can still teach us youngins a thing or two (no, I'm not referring to Bob Josefsberg).

Best meat market to pick up other lawyers or judges:

The "networking sessions" near the main ballroom!

It was hot, tight, and filled with lots of attractive people holding glasses filled with dark liquids. All we needed was a disco ball and some Kool and the Gang and those "sessions" could have taken on a whole new meaning.

Best no-show that made the event much much better:

This one's a no brainer --

We regret that scheduled keynote speaker Associate Justice Clarence Thomas has a Supreme Court conflict which will prevent his participation.

Sorry, swlip!

Actually, Judge Dubina was pretty interesting (if you could hear him above the din).

Hey schmuckies, when the Chief Judge of the 11th Circuit is addressing you, shut the hail up and eat your chow.

Best-run plenary session by a guy who actually dressed up nice and wore a suit and tie for the occasion:

Who else -- Scotty D!

Kudos to Brian Spector and Adam Rabin and all the organizers, judges and participants for making this the best FBA B SD FL BABC yet.

(Boy, that really rolls off the tongue.)

Announcing the Formation of McCabe Tebow PA!

Here's Ryon McCabe and some other guy.

Adam, no offense but the dude's moved up.

"A Certain Look In the Eye and An Easy Smile."

Ever get an earworm?

I've been endlessly replaying "Dogs" in my head all morning and can't seem to shake it. Must be the mood I'm in today.

Speaking of old men, I understand a bunch of us geezers (plus Adam Rabin) will be sharing war stories about our many trial victories at the Hyatt on Friday.

Strike that -- we will be using illustrative examples to highlight and explain certain important complex commercial litigation techniques.

Look for me, I'll be the older Jewish guy bragging about how I brilliantly outsmarted, outfoxed, and outclassed my opponent. Should be pretty easy to find.

Completely unrelated, but I see that Alan Kluger has finally abandoned that meshuga Teflon class action he's been litigating for the last four years.

You may recall Alan touted these cases as part of his effort to reshape his firm into a "national trial firm."

Sorry Alan, I wish I had a different song in my head, but be thankful it's "Dogs" and not something like the Meow Mix jingle or "Oops I Did It Again."