3d DCA Watch -- Salter v. Cope Smackdown!

Well I got ready for my deposition this morning the way I often do -- by rewatching Paul Williams' sensitive, nuanced portrayal of a badly misunderstood romantic in Phantom of the Paradise, then downing two shots of kettle-corn gin and heading to the office and just flat-out wingin' it.

I thought it went awesome.

God I love being a lawyer!

Then I realized it was bunker time, and that I would have to trudge through the Very Important Thoughts™ of the Robed Ones®, and my inner Paul Williams started to rise up again, hurt and betrayed by a tragic and senseless disfigurement, my only refuge to hide behind a (blog) mask and play clunky old synthesizers and type out this latest 3d DCA entry......

Wow, was that too much?

Anyways, let's go:

Trust Care Services v. AHCA:

Salter v. Cope in a battle of statutory interpretation!

For old times' sake, I'm going with Cope on this one.

Alvarado v. Bayshore Grove:

Hey this case involves Melanie Damian!

Wait a second, who the hail is Russell Landy?

Moving on....

Actually,  this case is notable because Judge Schwartz references the "tipsy coachman":

Although the ground was not relied upon below, we invoke the “tipsy coachman” modernized as the “drunken cabbie” rule....

With all respect, "drunken cabbie" is not even modern enough -- the kids nowadays call it "drunk texts from last night."

My work here is done.