Now Your Condo is a Dangerous Instrumentality!

Love the handkerchief!

Spencer Aronfeld Hates Bedsores!

 
Insert clever comment by SFL here.

Check Out This Fascinating Visual Illusion!

You know how the intertubes are full with visual illusion experiments of various kinds, the type people put on Facebook all the time?

Here, if you stare directly and without blinking at the contrasting polka dots appearing on Spencer's shirt and tie, you will discover an important and timely message about preventing children's injuries (or possibly a penguin on a grilled cheese sandwich?).

Gotta love timewasters like these.....

Spencer Aronfeld = La Muerte!

I don't speak much Spanish, so I hope I got the headline right.

Why is This Attorney Club Different From All Other Attorney Clubs?

 
Hmm, let's see -- everyone gathered around a table, there is food, wine and presentations -- is it Pesach all over again?

(What can I say --this stuff is like catnip).

"Me Llamo Spencer Aronfeld...."

"Y tengo una barba de chivo super cool!!"

Spencer Aronfeld: Live from the Mountaintop!

Check out the perspective of the viewer in this Spence clip on slip and falls:

That's useful and accurate information btw.

But it does seem as if he is slightly elevated -- it reminds me of that classic bit from Andy Kaufman, making fun of how hosts like David Letterman have their chairs and desks way above those of their guests:

Now Red Bull Is Trying to Kill You!

I've decided -- in the interests of safety -- to encase myself in a hermetically sealed plastic bubble so as to avoid encountering anything that may be possibly harmful to my health.

But what if I fall in love?

Attention Spencer Aronfeld Haters: This One's For You!

The dude's an easy target, but when's the last time you organized and established a legal support system to help the homeless?

Sorry, Hospitals Aren't Safe Either!

First they came for the bounce houses,
and I didn't speak out because I wasn't a bounce house enthusiast.
Then they came for the school buses,
and I didn't speak out because I don't ride one anymore.
Then they came for the sushi chefs,
and I got really pissed off because I love sushi.

Hey, it's gotta end somewhere.

Your Tuesday Morning Digital Dump!

Hi kids, I hope everyone had a nice and restful President's Day weekend.

So let's see what is happening around town:

1.  Yes, that guy also filed a Carnival Triumph lawsuit (pending before Judge Moore).

2.  Florida Supreme Court declines to hear judge/Facebook "friends" case.

3.  You know you want to hire Casey Anthony as your next paralegal:

The lack of a high school diploma and formalized education will not prevent a career in law as a paralegal. Neither will misdemeanor convictions for lying to police, felony convictions for felony bad check charges or even allegations of kidnapping and murder.

Why should it -- welcome to the South Florida job pool!

Now Your Hotel Wants to Hurt You!

After learning about dangerous kids' parties and cruise ships, I decided to hole myself up in a hermetically sealed room at the Ritz.

Big mistake:

Spencer Aronfeld -- Now With More Facial Hair!

I'm sure what Spencer is saying here is important and very helpful, but I couldn't get past the new George Clooney-like facial hair -- hey, didn't we already miss Movember?

You could have helped cure testicular cancer with that thing!

Happy New Year, Plebes!

Well it's that time of year, and most of you are away in North Carolina, the Keys, Colorado and points east, west, south, and north somewhat.

We hope you had a decent 2012 and wish all of you a prosperous, successful, peaceful, and loving 2013.

Thanks for all the tips and comments!

Ok, I'll leave you with one more image of an unshaven beach bum on vacation after a year of hard work -- yes, you guessed it:

And You Thought Bounce Houses Were Bad!

 
Try taking your kid on a nice cruise.

What kind of monster are you?

It truly is the end of the world as we know it.....

Texting While Driving? No. Filming While Driving? YES!

In our latest WITWISA™ ("Where in the World is Spencer Aronfeld"?)  installment, Spence provides a worthwhile public service message about texting while driving, all while filming in his car as traffic whizzes by at unaccountably high speeds.

Maybe pull over into a parking lot first?  We're worried!

Spencer Aronfeld -- Don't Trust What People Put on Their Websites!

Good morning!

In the news this morning:

1.   Yes, the Dolphins still suck.

2.  SHB attorney Marc Levinson now knows never to invite Nevin Shapiro to your bachelor's party (you may have to give a deposition about it later).

3. Spencer Aronfeld was on Tyra (about 5:30 in).

4.  Kendall Coffey lives part-time in Melbourne.

Melbourne?

5. Happy Birthday, text message!

And how was your weekend?

Spencer Aronfeld and the Perils of Bounce Houses!

Just what kind of parent are you?

Do you want your kid's birthday party to end in unmitigated tragedy?

Take a look:

First of all, this seems like extreme niche marketing -- would someone whose child was injured in a bounce house accident easily find this video on YouTube?

Maybe Spence is Google-optimized!

Secondly, based on concerns properly raised by Spence, I've taken steps to ensure my child's next birthday party is safe and accident-free:

1.  I've removed all plastic cutlery, cups, plates and other choking hazards such as food or cake;
2.  Balloons have been replaced with inflated safety gloves;
3.  To prevent risk to others, no children or parents are permitted to attend; and
4.  I've locked my child in a windowless, empty room for the duration of the party.

Happy Birthday Timmy!!!!

Carlos Loumiet in Cross-Hairs Again.

After successfully beating the OCC and suing for $4 million in damages, Carlos Loumiet (now at DLA Piper) finds himself the subject of a suit by the receiver overseeing the R. Allen Stanford Ponzi scheme:

"As a partner at Greenberg Traurig and then Hunton & Williams, Carlos Loumiet helped design the basic architecture of the Ponzi scheme by helping Stanford establish and operate unlicensed foreign bank offices in the U.S. and essentially hijacking the sovereign island nation of Antigua through the use of political corruption, loans made with funds stolen from Stanford's investors, and even writing the laws that governed Stanford International Bank's operations," said plaintiff attorney Ed Snyder, who filed the complaint, in a prepared statement.

Denies impropriety

Loumiet denied any wrongdoing.

"I can say that I have never in my long career knowingly helped any client commit any wrongdoing," Loumiet said in a prepared statement. "I have never represented anyone that I knew was engaged in wrongdoing. And after years of investigations by the federal government and months of trials involving Allen Stanford and his codefendants, I have not been implicated in any wrongdoing."

Likewise, the two named law firms said they had no idea what was going on. Hunton & Williams called the suit "factually and legally baseless and an overreach by Stanford Financial Group's understandably frustrated investors."

The attorney for Greenberg Traurig, Jim Cowles, said the lawsuit is just one more in a series of legal actions intended to "pry open a deep pocket" in order to compensate victims.

More allegations from the suit here.

If Carlos beats this one too, he'll be keeping my friend Andres Rivero plenty busy.

In other news, Spencer Aronfeld speaks through an old Campbell's soup can about the recent Lawyers to the Rescue Hurricane Sandy fundraiser:

Spence -- hire a sound guy!

Try to Vote, Plebes!

Wow, so a lot going on this morning.

First off -- RIP Neil Jay Berman.

Second, an actual Herald editorial expressing a real opinion:

While we’re at it, there are other aspects of our voting process that desperately need to be changed.

• Voter purges late in the election year. It’s hard to avoid the conclusion that the purge carried out in Florida targeted minority voters and other communities that favor Democrats. It was ill-crafted and designed to restrict voting rights, rather than guarantee them. This is contrary to the best American traditions.

• Fewer early voting days. Was it just a coincidence that the early-voting schedule pushed by Gov. Rick Scott eliminated the last Sunday before the election, a day traditionally used by black churches to get their congregations to vote? You’d have to believe in the tooth fairy to buy that.

• Long, perplexing ballots. This year’s ballot goes on and on, with 11 constitutional amendments written about as clearly as those manuals that “explain” how to assemble a complicated children’s toy with 23 moving parts. Let’s not do this again.

Voting is a right, as well as a duty. Too many Americans take it for granted. Do your part and vote, and let’s hope that next time around those who make the laws make voting easier instead of harder. 

Third, here's the lawsuit Kendall Coffey, Mike Olin, Bruce Rogow, and Seth Miles filed to keep the early voting sites open, pending before Judge Ungaro:

12. The voting facilities within these Counties were plainly inadequate to meet the
needs of County electors seeking to exercise their right to vote during the early voting period provided by Florida law.

13. The extraordinarily long lines deterred or prevented voters from waiting to vote.
Some voters left the polling sites upon learning of the expected wait, and others refused to line up altogether.

14. These long lines and extreme delays unduly and unjustifiably burdened the right to vote.

The complaint is only nine pages long and was prepared in a hurry, but can anyone seriously dispute the above three factual allegations?

Fourth, make fun of Spencer all you want (I certainly do!), but the kid has his heart in the right place:

"A Great Time For A Great Cause"

Fundraiser for Hurricane Sandy Victims Sponsored by Lawyers to the Rescue

Join Lawyers to the Rescue as we raise funds and awareness for victims of Hurricane Sandy. Money raised will be sent to the American Red Cross Hurricane Sandy Fund.

The event will include:
-Great Networking Opportunity
- Wine Tasting
- Free Food
- Music
- Prizes

Event Entrance Fee: $20.00 goes to the Red Cross Hurricane Sandy Relief Fund

To make a donation to this cause, please click on the link below:
http://www.lawyerstotherescue.org/HurricaneSandyRelief.html

I told you there was a lot going on today!

d more here: http://www.miamiherald.com/2012/11/05/3079929/the-right-and-duty-to-vote.html#storylink=cpy