Best Man For the Job.

Let's see, if I were the Governor and wanted to appoint someone to the South Florida Water Management District, which oversees an annual budget in excess of $1 billion(!), who would be my ideal candidate?

For sure I'd want someone who has never belonged to any organization -- ever -- that works on environmental or water issues.

I'd definitely want someone who is opposed to the historic purchase and restoration of 27,000 acres of Everglades currently owned by U.S. Sugar.  In fact, I'd want someone who was a featured speaker at a protest rally against the purchase.

I'd want someone who runs a Tea Party organization that is opposed to all environmental regulation and may possibly be a stealth front group for special interests.

I'd want someone who wants to slash the water district's budget so it can't do anything to help the Everglades.

I most certainly would want someone opposed to any regulation of greenhouse gases, and who wants to repeal the cap-and-trade regulatory program that reduces greenhouse gas emissions from electric utilities.

I'd want someone who heads a political organization that won't disclose its big-money donors:

Jumping into this political fight and mimicking the arguments of Florida Crystals is the not-for-profit Tea Party in Action, out of Boynton Beach. The group has produced a 30-second spot attacking Gov. Crist and the deal. Under Florida law, the group doesn't have to identify its donors. In an interview, Tea Party in Action Chairman Jim Moran refused to do so. So much for the tea party hating politics as usual.

Yes sir, I'd want Boynton Beach estate planning attorney Jim Moran!

Congratulations Florida.

South Florida Tea Partiers -- We're All Mischpocha Now.

After all that tsurris and farmisht and the fartust and with all the khazers and then the whole megilla, the feuding South Florida tea partiers are sitting down to a nice flanken, legally speaking of course.

Ok, even I'm not sure what any of that means, but they appear to have possibly settled their differences or at a minimum abandoned their lawsuit before Judge Marra.

And this to me shows great seykhl.

Tea Partiers Move To Sanction Each Other!

When last we checked in on the local tea party-on-tea party battle raging before Judge Marra, plaintiff's counsel filed an emergency motion to withdraw and there were somewhat odd cloak-and-dagger allegations flying back and forth.

On September 7, the Court granted the motion to withdraw and gave the plaintiffs until October 1 to find new counsel.

On September 30 -- not October 1 -- the defendant tea party filed a motion for sanctions, arguing that.....well you can read the darn thing yourself.

Plaintiffs have now responded -- through new lawyer Tim Lucero -- and they argue....well, I've Scribd it here.  They also demand $2k from defendants for having to prepare a response.

What a fine litigious mess these innocent patriots have wandered into!

Hey -- Anything Happening in the SD FL Tea Party Case?

Tea Party Withdrawal Motion

Funny you should ask!

First, the plaintiffs filed an emergency motion seeking to file a motion under seal because the motion allegedly contained defamatory statements made by defendants about plaintiffs and they did not want these allegedly false statements further disseminated.

 Judge Marra, however, said that if that were so then all actions for defamation, slander, or libel would be entitled to be filed under seal.

(Smart guy, this judge.)

Also, the plaintiffs filed the emergency motion through the CM/ECF system, which is a no-no.

So then what?

Well, funny you should ask.

Then plaintiffs' counsel Gus Sardinia and Frank Herrera filed a motion to withdraw as counsel, saying that there may be conflict in continuing to represent the plaintiffs because the lawyers are considering filing their own lawsuit against the defendants over the allegedly defamatory statements:

On or about July 29, 2010 it came to the undersigned’s attention that the Defendants had begun defaming the Plaintiffs and their counsel. Plaintiffs attempted to bring the same to the attention of the Court under seal, but such relief was denied. (D.E. 56 & 57).1 Having evaluated the defamatory statements, Plaintiffs’ counsel is considering bringing an action of their own against the Defendants in connection with the defamatory statements.

 They also ask Judge Marra the following:

Based on a recent string of emails between counsel and Mr. Guetzloe, the undersigned anticipates that the Defendants will oppose this Motion falsely asserting that the undersigned have perpetuated some wrongful campaign of injustice on the Defendants. In the event that the Defendants’ opposition to the instant Motion includes any defamatory statements against the undersigned (as it is anticipated it will), or reference to prior defamatory statements, counsel asks that the Court immediately strike or seal the same to avoid the perpetuation of such defamation.

So in other words everything is pretty much hunky dory in Tea Party land!

More on it all here.

Teabaggers Strike Back!

Let's talk about a topic I love -- teabagging.

Excuse me, "Tea Partiers."

We've previously written about the intra-teabag legal fight brewing before Judge Marra.

Now comes word that Judge Marra has set a trial date and other deadlines and defendant/lawyer Fred O'Neal has filed a summary judgment motion against the plaintiff, South Florida Tea Party, that includes some strong allegations.

Basically, Fred says he never threatened anybody with any litigation, the emails are truncated and omit important information, and besides O'Neal was just old and upset over the Gators losing to Alabama.

Hail, I was mad about that too.

So mad that -- like all good Tea Partiers -- I decided to secede from the Union and start my own heavily armed country.

So far I have asked two highly qualified candidates to serve in my administration -- in a Steven Seagal sort of way -- and once we clear up a few minor legal details (ok, restraining orders?), I've no doubt Drew and Zooey will finally join me in forming that cherished, more perfect union.
Tea Party Summary Judgment