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Hiển thị các bài đăng có nhãn Venetian Salami. Hiển thị tất cả bài đăng
Hiển thị các bài đăng có nhãn Venetian Salami. Hiển thị tất cả bài đăng
Thứ Tư, 16 tháng 5, 2012
3d DCA Watch -- Are You Ready for the Summer?
Yes kids, the bunker-bods are back!
By that I mean the Resplendently Robed Ones are nearly summer-ready, after grueling hours toiling in the mechanical room/gym, performing isometric exercises by attempting to remove sinks and toilets bolted to the bunker walls, and of course shot put, lots and lots of shot put.
CAPTION CONTEST!
1. "The chicks at FIU call that 'bunker-butt!'"
2. "Now THAT's what I call Venetian Salami!"
One more?
3. "All those in favor of reversal please signify by a show of....well, just signify."
So let's get out of the Resplendently Buffed Ones way and move right on to this week's meager civil offerings (hey, you can't develop both your pecs and precedent at the same time):
Portales v. ABC:
Practitioners' note -- if you want to object to a procedure on appeal, you should probably object to the procedure below.
Now let's hit the beach!
Thứ Tư, 18 tháng 4, 2012
3d DCA Watch -- Welcome to BIB!
The short-sleeved robes are out at the bunker, heralding the cyclical change in bunker seasons typically running from mid April until late this year when the mechanical closet/gym is transformed into the swanky, ultra-chic BIB (aka Bunker Ice Bar).
For those who have never been, BIB is an invitation-only, must-see sensory experience -- the ice sculpture of Judge Schwartz is reason enough to find a way in past the
Hmm, I'm seeing double already.....
Onward:
E&H Cruises v. Baker:
Venetian Salami, peoples!
Valesquez v. South Florida Federal Credit Union:
Judge Salter holds his nose and but otherwise affirms how a credit union "aggressively" went after the repossession of a couple's boat.
Deutsche Bank v. Cagigas:
How many times have we gone over the Kozel factors, trial judges?
Sheesh -- make the express findings before you dismiss a case as a sanction.
It's the least you could do (plus it's the law).
Thứ Năm, 22 tháng 3, 2012
Yes, Once There Really Was a Case About Venetian Salami!
Oh great Khaleesi, upon the seventh dark moon of the House Targaryen our forefathers set forth from the Dothraki desert and ventured into the wilds of the Red Lands (i.e., Tallahassee), where they were captured by the powerful yet benevolent Lord of the Eighth Kingdoms, Ser Venetian Salami:
And thusly Ser Salami did reveal upon the noble Dothraki litigants this great and enduring truth:
The first step of the Venetian Salami analysis may involve a burden shift.Together Khaleesi, we must all say it together:
ALL HAIL VENETIAN SALAMI!!
ALL HAIL VENETIAN SALAMI!!
Thứ Năm, 21 tháng 4, 2011
Listen to Local Lawyers Give Impressions!
Boy I miss Fred Travelena.
I mean, no one rocked the Tonight Show or the Jerry Lewis Telethon with a better impression of Sammy Davis or Wayne Newton than big Freddie, RIP.
Well if you want to hear local lawyers do some of their favorite impressions then tune in at 5 p.m. on Tuesdays on AM radio 880:
"The Lawmen Show" is a call in talk show featuring three attorneys with their live impressions of legal issues and business news, sometimes controversial and sometimes it's just fun.Sounds fun -- here's my impression of Iqbal!
And here's my impression of Venetian Salami!
The attorneys are careful to explain to callers that they are only offering their impressions during short phone calls...Right, do not confuse their wicked impression of Judge King with the real thing!
Thứ Tư, 9 tháng 3, 2011
3d DCA Watch -- Let's Do the Time Warp Again -- Apex Depos, Economic Loss Rule and Venetian Salami!
I have a quick question -- can you convert a simple breach of contract action into a tort claim for damages?
Has anyone researched this?
Oh well, let's suck in a deep whiff -- and hold it -- from this week's written utterances, freshly baked from the dank, dark, desultory, Desilu Studios'-like concrete wonderland that is our very own JusticeBunker™:
Walker v. Figarola:
It appears we have finally found something truly apodictic:
Similarly, their complaint failed to state a cause of action for civil theft. As this Court explained in Ginsberg, 645 So. 2d at 494, “Where damages sought in tort are the same as those for breach of contract a plaintiff may not circumvent the contractual relationship by bringing an action in tort.” The Walkers seek to recast their simple breach of contract claim into a tort claim to avoid the reality that the statute of limitations has run on their contract claim. But the allegations are for a simple breach of an oral contract—Figarola borrowed $25,000 from the Walkers which he promised to repay within three weeks, and the loan remains unpaid.Hmm, you don't say -- is there a rule that governs all this?
Rocomonde v. Marshalls:
Judge Emas in the house, reversing an sj for a lady who tripped on a mobile clothing rack at Marshalls:
In the instant case, the trial court found, as a matter of law, that Marshalls was not negligent, because Rocamonde saw the mobile rack in the aisle, had the ability to look at the base of the rack, and failed to do so. However, “it is the dangerous condition of an object which must be open and obvious, not simply the object itself.” Kloster Cruise Ltd. v. Grubbs, 762 So. 2d 552, 555 (Fla. 3d DCA 2000). Although the cart itself was open and obvious, a primary issue here is whether the protruding bottom portion of the rack – the condition which is alleged to have caused her to trip and fall – was open and obvious. Viewing the record in a light most favorable to Rocamonde, there is evidence that she tripped over the protruding base of the rack which was hidden or obscured from her view. It cannot be said as a matter of law that Rocamonde was aware of this condition.I don't know, but the last time I was at the downtown Marshalls I would have been thrilled to just have a mobile clothing rack blocking my aisle.
If I recall correctly, I had immediately in front of me the following:
1. scattered children's books;
2. part of a gourmet macaroni box that someone noshed from and was now on the floor;
3. an LSU Tigers golf club cover;
4. a homeless person; and
5. Herman Russomanno.
See what I mean?
Reynolds v. Gero:
Venetian Salami.
Yes, you heard me.
Deal with it.
General Star v. Atlantic Hospitality:
Apex depos -- what is this, the 90s?
Listen closely, kids:
Discovery is intended to be part of the “just, speedy, and inexpensive" determination of disputes—not a device to get greater attention at an adversary’s headquarters.Ok then, I suppose I should send out a cancellation notice for that three-day Kim Rothstein depo I just scheduled in Aruba.
Thứ Tư, 29 tháng 12, 2010
Thứ Sáu, 25 tháng 6, 2010
Judge Fay Explains How CocoDorm.com Works!
Bản tóm tắt này không có sẵn. Vui lòng
nhấp vào đây để xem bài đăng.
Thứ Năm, 27 tháng 5, 2010
Your Useless and Pointless Knowledge

Let me ask you something -- what is the point of the Herald's five-minute summary, or whatever it's called -- that occupies a half page yet provides no new content of any kind?
Are there really people out there who are unable to scan a newspaper like the Herald in five minutes, without having a pointless summary that attempts to replicate what the Herald looks like on the internet?
Seriously, the paper's thin enough without having repetitive filler that serves no purpose whatsoever.
For that matter, I feel the same way about Tables of Contents and Authorities in briefs -- if your brief is 30 pages or less, and you are not in an appellate court that requires it, you are wasting everyone's time by clogging up the beginning of your document with something that no one ever looks at or refers to ever again.
Have you ever read a 25 page brief but suddenly went "where is Venetian Salami, I must find it immediately, I'm unable to simply skim the brief and find it quickly, there must be a mildly faster way -- YESSS!"
In other news, I heard Peter Valori on the radio the other day:
PETER VALORI, ATTORNEY, DAMIAN & VALORI LLP: Typically the person that you're trusting knows nothing of the fraud. They've been victimized themselves, but they just don't know it yet. So they make the perfect candidate to draw in new investors because they have no sense that what they're doing could potentially be harmful to their friend or family member.Peter, you're a good guy and fine attorney, but come on, you definitely want to put your best face out there, know what I mean?
Thứ Tư, 18 tháng 11, 2009
3d DCA Watch -- Have I Died And Gone to Heaven?

You know, I find it more than a little annoying that Scott Rothstein has stolen my 3d DCA "bunker" imagery.
It's mine, dammit!
You can have Dr. No and his lair, "frickin' sharks with frickin' laser beams attached to their frickin' heads", Jack Benny and his vault, but leave our beloved judicial bunker out of it.
Oh well, I can't be too upset because today is my birthday and the 3d DCA baked a salted and air dried meat cake just for me!!
How do I know it was for me, you ask?
Alright, see for yourself --
Gonzalez v. Londoff Chevrolet:
Affirmed. See Venetian Salami Co. v. Parthenais, 554 So. 2d 499 (Fla. 1989).I think that's pretty much all that needs to be said.
But wait a minute, they're not done --
Hall v. Pro Access:
The plaintiff also did not show that exercising personal jurisdiction over Hall comports with due process. See Venetian Salami Co. v. Parthenais, 554 So. 2d 499 (Fla. 1989). Thus, the trial court should have granted Hall’s motion to dismiss.Could truer words ever have been spoken?
Kids, talk amongst yourselves -- I may need to take the rest of the day off.
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