I'm Back! (The Situation, Not So Much).

Hi kids, did June even happen?

It feels like a Dallas/Newhart fever dream, what with Guest Blogger, Godwhacker, someone named Faker SFL, someone named "Patrick Goggins" (I'm kidding!), lots of prurient content (if you're grumpy gus Scalia) -- plus a certified Time Traveler.

I wish I could say I'm fully rested and restored, but I spent a month in sybaritic pursuit of frivolous, purely hedonistic pleasures, pushing myself to and beyond all known mental and physical limits, until I literally collapsed from exhaustion, unable to imbibe through my senses or pores even one more delectable morsel of transitory joy from my decadent surroundings, leaving me drained and emptied of all energy and life force, quaking quietly and gasping for breath as I pulled myself together and somehow crawled with trembling hands and unsteady feet back into my law office.

And summer's just kicking in!

Let's start the week off with a thorough, devastating legal defeat for our good friend The Situation, courtesy of the always dapper Magistrate Judge O'Sullivan:

The undersigned finds that the plaintiffs have failed to present a triable issue of fact as to whether the defendants’ “The Fitchuation” t-shirt was likely to confuse consumers into believing that the shirt came from the plaintiff rather than A&F. Additionally, the plaintiffs did not satisfy their burden of showing that they had valid rights to “The Situation” as a trademark covering apparel at the time that A&F introduced its “The Fitchuation” t-shirt.

See, this is important legal stuff!

My informed legal opinion:  Once the Houlinator™ entered an appearance, put a stick in it, The Situation was done.

But that's why God gave us appellate courts, right?

"The Situation" vs. A&F -- Trial in August!

Incredibly, The Situation's case against Abercrombie and Fitch rolls on, with the parties having consented to trial in August before Magistrate Judge O'Sullivan.

The defendant has brought on Gerry Houlihan as counsel, and there is a sj motion pending, but it's hard to believe the parties have not been able to resolve this one already.

(A whole bunch of documents filed in the case remain under seal, but this may change after the Magistrate Judge asked the parties to address that issue.)

Getting Cute With the Line Spacing?

I'm really enjoying this suit involving "The Situation" and Abercrombie & Fitch pending before Judge Lenard.

The parties are busy briefing a motion to dismiss directed to the second amended complaint, and a motion to strike stuff from that pleading, but I found this footnote to be interesting:

Plaintiffs’ one and half spaced brief (ECF No. 75) violates Judge Lenard’s order requiring that all filings be double-spaced (ECF No. 38, p. 10) and S.D. Fla. R. 5.1(a)(4) requiring 12 point font for all text including footnotes.

Hold the presses -- could this be true?

Can you imagine somebody playing with the spacing in order to get more room in the brief?

What is the world coming to!

(Just look at that spacing above.)

"The Situation" Continues to Cause a Situation for Abercrombie & Fitch!

The lawsuit over Abercrombie & Fitch's ostensible aggrievement over Michael "The Situation" Sorrentino wearing its clothing rolls on before Judge Lenard, with a second amended complaint and motion to dismiss and response.

This all after David Lichter was unable to settle the case at the end of June.

From the response:

In August of 2011, Defendants issued what they have termed a ―press release‖ as part of an international advertising campaign, using Sorrentino‘s name and the Mark in order to create enormous public awareness, notoriety and publicity of its‘ brand, its‘ stores, its‘ products and its‘ e-commerce web sites. (DE 68 Ex. B). (The ―Press Release‖) The face of the Press Release promotes the stores operated by Defendants and it directs viewers to the web addresses of their e-commerce sites, where Defendants sell their branded products. The engine that drove the huge publicity and marketing campaign that was intended (and did in fact follow), was the use of Plaintiff‘s name and the Mark. (DE 68 ¶14, 15, 33, & 57 and Ex. B).

On August 12, 2011,1 Defendants embarked on this global advertising campaign, using Sorrentino‘s name and the Mark to enhance brand awareness for its products by falsely claiming that Abercrombie had offered money to Sorrentino to stop wearing their goods. Sorrentino was humiliated and demeaned as a result of Abercrombie‘s advertising campaign. Abercrombie disseminated the Press Release among all major news distribution outlets and to other news mediums. Defendants also published the Press Release on their website and on their official Facebook page (hereafter, ―the Facebook Post‖). At no time, did Sorrentino, or anybody acting on his behalf, give implied or express permission to Defendants to use Sorrentino‘s name and/or his Mark in commerce.

Interesting question as to how much the case is worth under 540.08.  The Situation wants in excess of $5 million plus punis, obviously A&F will say it's worth much less.

Who knew the guy even wore shirts?

The Situation Sues Abercrombie & Fitch!

And Judge Lenard has it.

Oy veh!

Here are the claims in a nutshell:

          While on the hit TV show the “Jersey Shore” and as in his everyday life, Sorrentino (along with other cast members) occasionally wore Abercrombie brand clothing.

              Starting August 2011, Defendant embarked on a grand, worldwide advertising campaign using Sorrentino’s name, image and likeness to create brand awareness for its products by falsely claiming that Defendant had offered money to Sorrentino if he would stop wearing Defendant’s goods. 

          Defendant concocted this false advertising campaign using the name and image of Sorrentino, to promote and advertise Defendant’s stores and its products. This advertising campaign claimed that Sorrentino was contrary to the “aspirational nature of the (Abercrombie) brand”.

As part of the campaign, on August 12, 2011 stories were written by the press stating that the advertising campaign was a “marketing ploy” designed “to further (Abercrombie’s) name into the marketplace with one of the hottest brands on tv” which was intentionally and strategically released at the peak of the back to school season.  A true and  correct copy of the press release is attached hereto as Exhibit “B” and hereafter called the “Press Release”

        As part of the marketing ploy, Defendant contacted representatives of MTV (the network that distributes the “Jersey Shore”) and allegedly offered to pay money to the Sorrentino if he would stop wearing Abercrombie brand clothing while on the show and at other times. 

           That offer was never made to Sorrentino, nor was it ever conveyed to Sorrentino by a representative of Defendant.

           Defendant claimed in the press release that by wearing Abercrombie clothing, Sorrentino would be “causing significant damage” to the image of the Abercrombie brand.  In essence, Defendant’s campaign was to make the ridiculous claim that Sorrentino was not worthy enough to wear Abercrombie clothing or that Sorrentino was so undesirable that wearing Abercrombie clothing would cause “damage” to Defendant.  The center piece of the advertising campaign was the huge success and popularity of Sorrentino.  The falsity of the advertising campaign is further demonstrated by Defendants actions to (at the same time that they are claiming that Sorrentino was damaging their image) attempt to associate themselves with Sorrentino by openly advertising specifically designed t-shirts using the Plaintiffs’ Marks.

"The Situation" Strikes Back!

We've previously covered the various and sundry litigation involving Mike "The Situation" Sorrentino, who has been ably assisted in his legal efforts by our own Richard Wolfe.

(FYI, the suit against "The Dad" settled quietly back in July.)

Now, fresh off a brawl to be broadcast on MTV, The Abbed One is striking back -- this time at at a clothing manufacturer who has sued The Sit in Miami-Dade circuit court over a licensing deal gone wrong.

Mike says "I ain't done you wrong, you done me wrong!" (I'm paraphrasing).

You can read the answer and counterclaim here.

I'd like to see how the depositions proceed in this one.

"The Situation" Sues His Dad (With Richard Wolfe's Help)!

The Situation Dad Complaint


Courtesy of our friends at Riptide, it appears that Jersey Shore's "The Situation" has sued his polite, exceedingly charming father in the 305 and has hired our own Richard C. Wolfe to prosecute dear old Daddy.

The case is before Judge Huck.

Can you imagine the father appearing before Judge Huck pro se?

Here's a taste of what Judge Huck can expect: