If Your Secretary Becomes Indispensable, Fire Her!

 
That's the sage wisdom offered by Englewood(?) attorney Charles Diez, Jr. in the latest edition of the beloved Florida Bar News:

When I joined the firm, he said, “Son, I’m going to give you some good advice.” That advice has stuck with me all these years, and I quote, “Never lie to another lawyer; never even think of lying to a judge; and never have a secretary you can’t fire.”

Ok, the first two I definitely agree with, but Charlie, on the last one -- does your secretary know this?

I'd offer a few more:

"Son, never follow your father into a restroom; when on a plane always sit to the left of Ervin Gonzalez (long story); and never give in. Never give in. Never, never, never, never--in nothing, great or small, large or petty--never give in, except to convictions of honor and good sense."

(Alright, that last one was Winston Churchill -- I modified it to conform to our local discovery practice).

In fact, here's what I believe:

Anyone have any others?