3d DCA Watch -- Special Tuesday Edition!

I know I know it's now Wednesday, but those sneaky coffee-swillers got together and decided to pull a fast one on us yesterday, knowing that nobody in their right mind pays any attention to the bunker except on hump day:

Sunbeam Television v. Clear Channel:

Hey, what do you know -- Judge Logue wrote an opinion!

BTW, his induction is set for October 26 at 3 p.m -- I'm sure everybody got the letter asking for sponsorships.  (I got naming rights to the broken Total Gym 3000!!)

Of course I kid -- we're actually happy about this choice and think he'll do a great job.

However, you can tell he's still new -- he didn't rule in favor of Laurie Waldman Ross.  How could that have happened?

Interesting legal issue, too -- how do you get appellate review on a motion to stay when the trial judge won't rule on the motion?

You apparently need to nudge the trial judge really hard:

Sunbeam asks us to rule on its stay request, based on the assertion that the stay request should be treated as denied because the trial court has not ruled on the request. Sunbeam asserts in the alternative that, because the trial court has yet to rule on its stay request, we should issue a writ of mandamus ordering the trial court to do so. We decline either alternative because the record reflects that Sunbeam still has avenues available to it to get this matter before the trial judge.1

Oh and here's footnote 1:

For example, Sunbeam could hire an actor to dress like Shakespeare and endlessly recite the motion out loud in an exaggerated acterly British accent during motion calendar.  Sunbeam could have Joe Matthews parachute over the courthouse and hand the judge a copy of the motion as he lands ever so gently on Judge Bailey's desk.  Sunbeam could surreptitiously rearrange the magnet letters on Judge Bailey's fridge to simply say "RULE NOW."

The third example brings up a terrific war story, though I've been enjoined from discussing it further until at least 2025.