Fast Zombies Suck!

Before we turn to, you know, legal issues, let's dispense with today's Glenn Garvin.....

Hey now! You know what they say -- a blind pig finds a broken clock twice a day inside an acorn, or something, but Glenn actually is right -- this show is awesome (I watched it this morning on video-on-demand).

But, as usual, Glenn gets the politics of Night of the Living Dead all wrong:

But with racial violence wracking America in the wake of Martin Luther King's assassination, a black character decapitating and disemboweling white people by the score -- even white people who were already technically dead -- inevitably assumed epic political proportions.

First off, the context is incomplete -- in addition to riots in the streets and MLK and RFK, you had the Tet offensive and the escalating violence in Vietnam.

Moreover, the black character wasn't just "killing whitey" in Glenn's reductive formulation, he was a bold and courageous leader -- giving orders, saving lives, and taking command -- not something seen in American cinema very often at that time.

Most importantly, Glenn misses the entire point of the ending, filled with grainy black-and-white photo images of Southern, white law-enforcement authorities with guns, laughing and committing cheery violence -- clearly evocative of historic newspaper accounts of white-on-black lynchings, ongoing KKK violence, Medger Evers, church bombings etc.

Speaking of zombies, what sane parent would intentionally submerge their child in a vat filled with Disney total-immersion purchasing opportunities:

“The world does not need another place to sell Disney merchandise — this only works if it’s an experience,” said Jim Fielding, president of Disney Stores Worldwide. The company plans to unveil the new look in May in Southern California, Long Island and Madrid, and is close to signing a lease for that Times Square flagship.

Theaters will allow children to watch film clips of their own selection, participate in karaoke contests or chat live with Disney Channel stars via satellite. Computer chips embedded in packaging will activate hidden features. Walk by a “magic mirror” while holding a Princess tiara, for instance, and Cinderella might appear and say something to you.

It’s your birthday? With the push of a button, eight 13-foot-tall Lucite trees will crackle with video-projected fireworks and sound. There will be a scent component; if a clip from Disney’s coming “A Christmas Carol” is playing in the theater, the whole store might suddenly be made to smell like a Christmas tree.

In other words, another remake of Dawn of the Dead.

Ok, I already reported about a month ago that Pat Riley really doesn't want his depo taken.

Now, in addition to the plaintiff's motion to compel and Pat's motion to quash, Dwyane Wade has also filed a motion for protective order regarding Riley's impending deposition.

In it, Robert Turken of Bilzin argues that deposing Riley would be a "fishing expedition" and that Riley knows nothing about the underlying facts of the alleged antitrust action. He also argues that the plaintiff's effort to depose Riley is for an improper purpose -- to gain leverage in the pending state court action.

Of course, it's possible a depo can be legitimate and permissible under Rule 26, and yet also have a collateral benefit to one of the parties in ancillary litigation.

My advice -- when you're going after someone who looms as large as Pat Riley, it's like taking down a zombie -- your first shot better be the right one.

This one feels like a misfire.