Thứ Tư, 22 tháng 7, 2009

3d DCA Watch -- The Written Utterances Have Arrived Edition!


Hi kids, can you believe it's only Wednesday?

The good news is the written utterances have arrived!!

Oh boy I'm so excited let me repeat -- the written utterances have arrived!!!

In fact, I don't have to tell you things are bad. Everybody knows things are bad. It's a depression. Everybody's out of work or scared of losing their job. The dollar buys a nickel's work, banks are going bust, shopkeepers keep a gun under the counter. Punks are running wild in the street and there's nobody anywhere who seems to know what to do, and there's no end to it. We know the air is unfit to breathe and our food is unfit to eat, and we sit watching our TV's while some local newscaster tells us that today we had fifteen homicides and sixty-three violent crimes, as if that's the way it's supposed to be. We know things are bad - worse than bad. They're crazy. It's like everything everywhere is going crazy, so we don't go out anymore. We sit in the house, and slowly the world we are living in is getting smaller, and all we say is, 'Please, at least leave us alone in our living rooms. Let me have my toaster and my TV and my steel-belted radials and I won't say anything. Just leave us alone.' Well, I'm not gonna leave you alone. I want you to get mad! I don't want you to protest. I don't want you to riot - I don't want you to write to your congressman because I wouldn't know what to tell you to write. I don't know what to do about the depression and the inflation and the Russians and the crime in the street. All I know is that first you've got to get mad.

SFL
: [shouting] You've got to say, 'I'm a HUMAN BEING, Goddamnit! My life has VALUE!' So I want you to get up now. I want all of you to get up out of your chairs. I want you to get up right now and go to the window. Open it, and stick your head out, and yell, [shouting]
SFL: "THE WRITTEN UTTERANCES HAVE ARRIVED!"

I want you to get up right now, sit up, go to your windows, open them and stick your head out and yell - "The written utterances have arrived!" Things have got to change. But first, you've gotta get mad!... You've got to say,"The written utterances have arrived!" Then we'll figure out what to do about the depression and the inflation and the oil crisis. But first get up out of your chairs, open the window, stick your head out, and yell, and say it: SFL: [screaming at the top of his lungs] "THE WRITTEN UTTERANCES HAVE ARRIVED"!!!

Oops, my bad -- was any of that out loud?

Well let's get right to this week's orders, because as we all know 3d DCA opinions are a dish best served piping hot.

Open Permit v. Curtiss
:

I have a dear friend who lately has had trouble sleeping.

My sweet one, please read this opinion when you go to bed tonight.

Not sure? Try out this small sample:
We agree that, under paragraph 17, the maintenance provision of the
Contract, Curtiss had a duty to maintain the property “in the condition as it existed
as of the Effective Date of the Contract.” However, if a loss to the property occurs,
and if the loss is determined to be a casualty pursuant to paragraph 16, then the
remedies provided by that paragraph are the only remedies available to the buyer.
Should it be determined that the seller were in some way responsible for the loss,
then it would not be a casualty and the provisions of paragraph 17 would apply
requiring the seller to maintain the property. The question presented, then, is
whether Curtiss was responsible, in any way, for the disappearance of the fixtures.
If he were responsible, then the provisions of paragraph 17 would apply. If he was
not, then the provisions of paragraph 16 would apply.
Sweet dreams and good night, my love.

Labati v. University of Miami:

Anyone remember Ferne Labati?

She used to coach the women's basketball program at UM, until she got all old and Abe Simpson-like, so UM "bought out her contract," a technical term for "don't let the door hit ya, old lady!"

So Ferne did the only noble thing, the right thing, and sued the pants off UM, of course with the help of Wild Bill Amlong.

Too bad the trial court granted summary judgment to UM, based on three "legitimate business justifications," such as the fact that no one gives a hoot about women's basketball at UM.

Judge Miller even granted UM's request for legal fees!

On appeal, the 3d affirmed, but reversed as to the fee award.

My question is why did UM, after winning summary judgment, go after their fees? That strikes me as vindictive and excessive, particularly after you let the coach go and defeated her legal challenge.

Guess I'm not heartless enough for the UM athletic department.

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